Letting Go to Let Grow

How can children take small steps toward more confidence and competence? How do well-meaning, caring adults get out of the way and enable opportunities for children to test their psychological immune systems, build skills and resilience, and test the boundaries beyond their comfort zones?  Jonathan Haidt, author of The Anxious Generation, and his colleague Let Grow Founder Lenore Skenazy offer one way - the Let Grow Project.  Read the first installment of how one local mom’s read of The Anxious Generation spurred an interest in “letting go to let grow”.

For more information on Let Grow and the Anxious Generation, click here.

Let Go and Let Grow

Conception: It was several months ago now that a friend recommended "The Anxious Generation", a book by Jonathan Haidt, about how too many adult-supervised, structured activities mixed with unsupervised and excessive smartphone use has led to overly anxious children.  I listened to it at the end of the school year and fell for the ideas hook, line, and sinker.  It resonated with me both as a mom and as a teacher.

One of the concepts that Haidt introduced in the book was a Let Grow initiative - The Let Grow Project - where children are encouraged to do something completely independently, usually succeed, and get a self-esteem boost from the effort.  Projects included activities such as baking, running errands, using public transportation, completing chores, and caring for others.  The book, and the seeds of the Let Grow Project, stayed with me through the summer.

The Let Grow idea rebloomed in my mind a few weeks ago when my husband announced he was offered a job in the city.  We have been incredibly fortunate that he has had a hybrid work life with flexible hours that have allowed him to get our two elementary-aged kids on the bus in the mornings.  It meshed well with my very inflexible school schedule, but it looked like the bliss wouldn't last.  Working in the city meant that he would have to leave before me at least a few days a week, resulting in over an hour that the kids would be unsupervised with no adult to get them out the door to the bus.  

Did we need to hire a sitter? Could one of the grandparents help? Could we pawn them off on a neighbor ...do some sort of childcare share? None of these sounded like great options for a plethora of reasons.  And then I thought, what if they could be independent?  What if we could remove the adult from the situation completely?  As it is, they are fed, dressed, and brushed by the time I leave anyway.  They just enjoy some TV time before the bus.  We started that routine years ago so that if my husband needed to log on early, he could.  Could this actually work?